Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Long Rant: Why Your Feelings Don't Matter

People joke about all kinds of things, people, events, disabilities, blah, blah, blah. We laugh, we get offended, but the underlying problem is that when we get offended, we can sometimes attempt to project our own discomfort with subject matters onto others and attempt to impose our own morality onto others, and because of jokes. 

Yeah, some jokes are insensitive, offensive, and downright cruel. But, these kinds of jokes are necessary to test boundaries as well our own discomfort at finding humor in truly horrendous events. You're not a terrible person if you laugh at a 9/11 joke, but you are a terrible person if you laughed on 9/11. You're not a terrible person for laughing at an AIDS joke, but you are a terrible person for laughing at a person dying of AIDS. Rape is never funny...rape jokes? Depends on the joke.

The growing social justice culture is like a vine slowly wrapping itself around free speech, choking the life out of free expression in an attempt to police anything spoken and put it in a neat folder of "Acceptable" and "Unacceptable." The problem becomes when individual groups decide that certain words and terms are offensive and hate speech, and thus attempt to disrupt societal narratives in an attempt to change reality based on their own feelings and subjective perspectives. And to that I say this: Fuck Your Feelings!!

Yes. Fuck your feelings, fuck my feelings, and fuck anyone else's feelings. We're all adults. You don't get to tell anyone what they can or can't say, and guess what? In your zeal to blot out bad words and "hate speech", you're not actually doing anything but allowing the real hateful people in this world to simply mask their vitriol and express it in other ways, because not every racist says "nigger" and not every homophobe says "faggot." 

All too often, I see this overly sensitive subset of society trying to tell me and others what we should be offended, what shouldn't be joked about, and what should matter to everyone. But, what I don't see is any real cohesive message nor any consistency from these individuals. Yeah, you'll be offended over racism, but let a black person be a Republican and you join in with the "Uncle Tom", "Coon", and "House Nigger" taunts. Feminism left and right, until a woman says she isn't down with your cause, and then you come out with every derogatory name in the book for her. 

Why do your feelings matter?  Why should we or the rest of the world take pause because something uttered caused you discomfort? I'm sorry, but part of living among the rest of us means that you will encounter things that run contrary to what you believe or how you think and feel. The easy solution to that is to surround yourself with like minded individuals and create your own harmonious utopia of clones that always agree on everything.

And when it comes to facts, your feelings definitely do not matter. I don't know when the left became these fundamentalists that scoff at reality in lieu of what feels good, but when that happened, I had to distance myself from that subset of liberalism. It is wholly unacceptable to promote things that are simply not true as some kind of guise of being accepting and promoting tolerance. Believe or not, you can be sympathetic to a group or cause while pointing out things about them that are objectively true or not true.

You know what you don't do? You don't create this Orwellian principle that any speech you deem hateful or offensive is subject to stifling and suppression because it might "harm" someone. Words don't harm... actions do. I can just as easily deem your words offensive and hateful and attempt to have them suppressed, but of course you would scoff at that, wouldn't you? 

If I still felt the way I did at 21 the way I do now at 31, I'd be out there with posters and picket signs, too, crying and bitching about how Milo Yiannopoulus is bringing hate and violence to America all while punching people and throwing urine at people I disagree with (I probably wouldn't even have the balls to leave my room). But, luckily, I realize that words, even bad ones, are just that, words. I learned to take a joke, I learned to take criticism, and I learned to block out truly vitriolic nonsense. 

I implore these new generations to learn to do the same, because they are going to learn the hard way that the majority of society is just trying to exist in this crazy world and not really giving a fuck about manspreading, or mansplaining, or "white privilege", or "Oscars so black". I never told my grandmother about the crap I endured at school because I knew she didn't really care the way I wanted her to. Instead, I stayed in my room and created my own little world to block out the bullshit I had to deal with both at school and at home.

Inadvertently, this prepared me for the world my grandmother claimed I was not ready for, because it taught me how to close out hate and vitriol, while still existing in a place from which I could not wait to remove myself. Slowly, but surely, I learned that adversity was everywhere, and that running from dissension was easier said than done. So, instead, I took it head on and it actually inspired critical thinking out of me. It was what led me to becoming an atheist, what led me to not giving a fuck who knew I was gay, and what eventually led me to leave behind the regressive narrative that is slowly engulfing the liberal left. 

Being mad didn't stop people from saying hurtful things to me, and letting them know how mad I was didn't change their feelings. Sometimes, people should take your feelings about something into consideration, and sometimes your feelings just plain don't matter. In any case, things are going to be said that you don't like. Jokes are going to be told that you find offensive. Truths are going to be said about you that you are not ready to hear. You make your stink, you scoff, you scowl, but in the end, you've made it out of the other end unscathed and you will move on with your life. You don't start online witch hunts, trying to get people's personal information to make death threats, SWAT them, or to contact their employers in an attempt to get them fired from their place of work. 

As callous as this sounds, this can simply be whittled down to learning how to take a fucking joke or just letting stupid people be stupid. We're not all the same, and that's what is so great about humanity. Things that make some laugh make others vomit. Things that some find beautiful other find abhorrent. We are empathetic creatures that don't set out to hurt each other maliciously, but often realize that some opinions and beliefs need to be challenged, regardless of how some feel about them.

That's life. Fuck your feelings, man. Fuck. Your. Feelings.

Okay, I'm done. 

No comments:

Post a Comment


What would it look like to see My impossible standards applied to me? To become everything I demand? What would it feel like to do T...